We have no policemen on Cortes so it would be a miracle if any of the members of the Ladies' Guild got themselves arrested for speeding or dangerous driving or such last Saturday night. Had they been, they would have felt very silly. Not for the fact of being arrested, heavens, that happens in the best regulated ladies' clubs but for the fact that the arrestees would likely have been tossed in the jug wearing naught but a diaper, a short frilly dress and hair ribbons, plus a wide-eyed innocent look that would surely wring the heart of a law minion even if we were doing thirty mph which is the equivalent of ninety elsewhere.
The event was the annual spring party, held at Mary Ward's house. Hazel and I were in charge of entertainment. We asked everyone who came to bring a brown bag of clothes. We traded the bags and each dressed in the clothing from the brown bag we were given. We looked mighty foolish but better foolish than dullish I always say. May Freeman was the winner and she was indeed cute in her frilly bonnet, long white nightie and shawl.
We played games and as always the games that Hazel and I had decided would be utter screams turned out to be rather dull and the quiet little filler-inners had us rolling in the aisles. We chose to play a ridiculous gave wherein we divided everyone into four teams with captains and gave each team an animal name - cats, dogs, sheep and donkeys. The teams had to rush around and find beans previously hidden and make their animal sound until their captain came and collected the loot. What a madhouse it was, all of the bow-wowing and baa-ing and meowing at once. To her dismay, one over-excited sheep pointed out a pile of beans to her sister, instead of properly baa-ing for her captain. Said sister delightedly hee-hawed and I bet that sheep would have liked to back up and bunt her one. The donkeys were the winners, as fine a bunch of big-eared, loud-mouthed creatures as ever you'd hope to see in any zoo.
"Let's play Charades" sounds like bustles and bows, swooning ladies and gallant gents, plush filled parlours and beaded antimacassars, whatever they are. It sounds like fun now to the Ladies' Guild anyway, most unexpected fun to most of us. Charades is a game of pantomimes. You have to "act out" a phrase without speaking, while the other members of your team try to guess what the phrase is as quickly as possible. We guilders are not afraid of overacting or overlaughing so it was a terrific success.
We threw a man out of that Guild party, too. Oliver Ward came home from Vancouver that night and expected to enter his own home and be greeted by his ever-loving wife. All reasonable enough I suppose but on LADIES GUILD PARTY NIGHT! We threw him out. We had to. He hung around for a while wistfully looking in the windows and then he went away.
If he breathes a word of what he saw that night......
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